The thing with this journey is I have more time to be with myself. And even though I am not an extrovert, I do feel lonely sometimes. It is not that I am a shy person, it is just I am very bad with reading people’s intention or body language. In fact I am oblivious to people’s intention. I cannot tell if they are being sincere and honest or lying. In my younger days I didn’t think of this too much, resulting many disappointment or painful experiences when people misused my trust or even betrayed me. However it did give me very few “new family members”, people that were really sincere and trustworthy. So far I’ve chat to some strangers I met in this station and when they heard that I were on my journey they asked me if they could join me on the trip, some even offered me support in terms of money or ships. I told them that I would think of it because I didn’t want to offend them by directly refusing the offer. This makes me uncomfortable. Oh how I really miss my late wife. She was the opposite of me. She was an outgoing person and could tell people’s intention on the spot. She was cheerful, energetic, smart, and beautiful. Many men were courting her, but in the end she married me. I remember one time I asked her why she chose me and she laughed a little, “Honey, I can tell a jerk the moment he speaks to me”. “How about me?”, I asked. She held my hands, looked deep into my eyes and said, “Dear silly husband, you are like an open book to me. I can tell what you are feeling inside out. You are a simple and honest man. That is the most important thing to me and I love you for it”. I really miss her.
One Reply to “Day 4: Missed Her”
I cried a little. Good writing! ?